Thursday, April 11 2002

Chicago Chronicle

Mark Henderson Suspended from IFL

 

Wrigleyville - Improviser Mark Henderson was suspended for two games by Commissioner Decautur Hilltop Griggs today. The Commissioner's office cited "excessive drunkenness and lewd behavior that is detrimental to the IFL" as the reason for the suspension. Since each team only plays two games per season, the suspension means Mr. Henderson is ineligible for play during the entire season. When approached by Chicago Chronicle reporters, a visibly upset Mr. Henderson said he had no comment and ducked into a nearby comic book store.

Mark Henderson

Disgraced improviser Mark Henderson

 
IFL Commissioner Decautur Hilltop Griggs

"I haven't banned anyone from league play in over 50 years" said the Commish "but will not hesitate to do so in the future if any player, coach, or GM sullies the good name of the Improv Fantasy League." Other players banned from baseball during the Commissioner's tenure as Major League Baseball Commissioner from 1921 - 1944 include:
• Benny Kauff, Phil Douglas, Jimmy O'Connell, and Coach Cozy Dolan of the New York Giants.
• Philadelphia Phillies Team President William D. Cox
• "Shoeless" Joe Jackson, Eddie Cicotte, Claude "Lefty" Williams, Buck Weaver, Arnold "Chick" Gandil, Fred McMullin, Charles "Swede" Risberg, and Oscar "Happy" Felsch of the Chicago White Sox.